30 Moves

I sometimes get a bit confused about what to call things. Not in an Alzheimers sort of way, but in a lived on both coasts of the US, have residency in 3 countries & lived in 30 different houses sort of way.

Do I call it a 'biscuit' or a 'cookie', a 'biscuit' or a 'scone', a 'flapjack', 'crumpet' or a 'pancake', and once I've eaten it do I put the crumbs in the 'bin' or the 'trash'? People took the piss out of Madonna for changing her accent when living in the UK, married to a Brit. But it is very easy to absorb bits of your environment. I say 'wee' as a way of saying diminutive, but also to describe a bodily function. It's inevitable having lived in Belfast & being married to a Scotsman for 13 years. I still often get asked if I am Irish. But less and less having been away from the Uk now since 2007. I had to change the way I pronounce some things in order to be understood. My slow southern drawl meant that even the shortest of words containing vowels would sound as if they contained 4-5 syllables when coming from my mouth. 'Dog', 'Water', 'Garage' are 3 which come readily to mind as being words I had to repeat many many times before people would understand me.

I now live in a country with 11 official languages. Every day I am surrounded by different languages - from English spoken with many different accents, Afrikaans, many different African languages and dialects, different cultures, different smells & tastes which are uniquely South African.

Yet here is where I most feel at home. From the 1st time I came to South Africa it started to get under my skin. It was funny that when I left the 1st time I could not wait to leave, and from the time I left I could not wait to come back. It is my heart home.

I have left behind people I love in every one of the places I have lived, some I lost touch with completely as I am rubbish at phoning, or writing anything other than emails.

I hope this is our last move. We have finally found our dream home; unfortunately it comes with a nightmare of a neighbour. I refuse to let him tarnish the love I have for my home. I refuse to let him manipulate and bully me into changing my behaviour to avoid upsetting him. We spent 1 year adjusting our behaviour, walking on eggshells and fretting we were going to cause conflict.

That is over. We discovered that the more we bent to accomodate the more he pushed us. I am finshed with being accomodating.

I can identify with this, it is one of my favourite quotes from Karen Blixen in 'Out of Africa', 'Here I am' Where I ought to be'. And here is where I will stay.